the gnats love #408. who knows why? really, i want to know. i've spent 6 agonizing days analyzing, blaming, reasoning and screaming at flying inscects.
i am at my wits end. and, as you know, my wits end is a dark and violent place.
at a time like this, one can't help but think about how we take our gnat-free lives for granted. why have i not given thanks, not only for a new day in good health-- but a new day without gnats in my mesh shower thingy.
i decided that today, on my walk to work, i would commit my thoughts to what to get for james for christmas. i could only think of the gnats. their passive-aggressive flying pattern, that gross red appendage, the pretentious silent g.
tomorrow, december 4th, is the day. blood, gnat blood will be shed. gnat families will be torn apart. the jig is up. my life will become quasi peaceful once more. say your prayers, you worthless sacks of shit. you've awakened a sleeping giant. you thought you were safe, didn't you? you heard all about me and my unshakable belief that even the tiniest of pests have souls. well, guess what? i still believe that. but tomorrow, your ass is mine. and your soul is going straight to the devil.
Friday, December 03, 2004
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1 comment:
at least they weren't mice.
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